I am grey on Deadspin. Ok, I only comment there about once a week anyway.
I am not grey on Lifehacker. I comment there once a year. I am not grey on Jezebel, where I am usually afraid to comment.
I star grey comments on the main io9 page, they stay grey. Even replies to me.
Overall though, I think this new system is just a way for Gawker to avoid getting sued by their employees for creating a hostile work environment. The whole point to Kinja, the friggin' tree if you will, is that we the users are somewhat in charge along with the authors. We are supposed to dismiss bad stuff and star/reply to good stuff. So now when I try to do this unpaid job that Denton has given me, I get notified that I better bring my own eye bleach. It seems to me that this boils down to "help us make things good by promoting good stuff, but if you find bad stuff it isn't our fault, we warned you it might be there." That's bullshit. Most sites don't warn me that I might find offensive stuff in the comments, they just remove it. Gawker is one of the big boys of the Internet. I wouldn't be surprised if more people get there news here than big local papers. But The Washington Post wouldn't make me responsible for content and then say "sorry, a few of your fellow users are jerks, not much I can do." They want to have it both ways and anytime anybody tries to do that it is doomed to fail.